When I first heard about Celebrate Recovery, I thought, “Seriously, why would anyone want to celebrate being in recovery?” But still, I went.
When I attended my first Celebrate Recovery meeting, I thought, “I can’t do this. I can’t talk to people about my hurts, habits, and hang-ups in life and expect them to still like me. I don’t think I belong here because I don’t know if I believe in Jesus.” But I kept going.
As I kept attending Celebrate Recovery meetings I learned something that I had never known before – people love! People who barely knew me, loved me, prayed for me, and comforted me. One woman in particular, barely knew me, but welcomed me into her life. This woman has been a large part of my recovery. I would venture to say that she is probably one the greatest people I have ever known and I thank God every day for bringing her into my life. She knows some of the darkest parts of me…and still, she loves me. There’s nothing like the body of Christ in action to turn an agnostic into a grateful believer and follower of Christ.
Before Celebrate Recovery, I was angry at God. If God was all mighty and powerful and had the power to make things good, then why did He let me grow up without a dad? Why did He let me endure so much pain in my life? Why didn’t ever mend the relationship with my mom? Why? Why? Why? Sometimes, I still fall into that line of thinking, but because of my wonderfully amazing Celebrate Recovery family, my accountability partners, and my sponsor, I am quickly reminded of the truth of how great our God is.
God brought me out of my pit and is, daily, transforming me to be more like Him. I don’t think there will ever be enough words to describe how I feel about the Celebrate Recovery ministry and how it has changed my life.
In February, I began a step study. A task which has not been an easy one. I recently shared my inventory with a wonderful woman, my sponsor, and she prayed for me and for healing for me. And I am free! The inventory seemed like a terrifying part of the step study, and something I wouldn’t want to do, that maybe I would try to skip. But now that it’s done, I couldn’t be more glad that I did it.
Yes, the pain of the wounds hurts and the healing is still in progress…but I am free! I am free of the chains that sin had tied on. I am free because of the sacrifice made by Jesus Christ. He laid down His life so that I could find freedom and redemption. And I am free!!!
Every day, there’s nothing I can do but thank God for all He has done and is continuing to do in my life. God has taken my biggest fear and my biggest gifts and combine and is now using me in other people’s lives.
Back in March, I was honored to write a poem for a friend of mine at Celebrate Recovery that I read after she gave her testimony. And tomorrow, I will be reading another poem that I wrote for another friend’s testimony. What an honor it is to see how God has taken all of our brokeness and brought us all together for the purpose of glorying Him.
I think that I will be forever grateful to and active in the Celebrate Recovery ministry.