Right Where I Am

I think we all struggle with thinking we’re not good enough and working hard to get where we need to be. While hard work isn’t a bad thing, hard work for the wrong reasons is. Working to get where you think you need to be is just absurd (I know because I’ve done it). God would rather we work hard to glorify Him and trust Him to get us to where He knows we need to be.

This morning, I came across a beautiful thought by Oswald Chambers, “Never allow yourself this thought, ‘I am of no use where I am,’ because you certainly cannot be used where you have not yet been placed.” It made me think of where I was before I came to Celebrate Recovery. I believed, IF (and it was a BIG if) there was a God, then He couldn’t possibly love me or use me where I was. I always thought I was too broken to be of any use to the God of the universe and too bad to be loved by Him.

Oh how I was mistaken!!

How often do we try to get ourselves out of whatever circumstances we’re in? We, in our human nature, try to avoid pain at all costs. But in trying to avoid it, some of us walk straight into it. I know that’s what I did for MANY, MANY years. In trying to avoid pain, I had trapped myself under layers of masks, lies, and hurt that I wasn’t able to get through on my own. So God, being loving and faithful, sent people into my life to break down the barriers. It’s been a year since I began Celebrate Recovery, and in that year I have learned that God IS using me, right where I am.

It still astounds me that God isn’t going to wait until I have my junk together to use me, but He has been using me from the beginning of my recovery (even though I didn’t believe it or see it at the time). God is using me right now, right where I am. I mean logically, He can’t possible use me where I haven’t been. And knowing that makes me thankful for where I am and where I have been. I’m not proud of my past by any means, but I no longer regret it because without it I wouldn’t be right where I am today.

We live in a broken, fallen world and until Jesus returns, there will continue to be pain and heartache, but our gracious God will continue to use that pain and heartache to glorify Himself. The question is, are you willing to submit to His will for your life?


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